Admittedly after a 6 month cooling off period I figured it might be okay to have dinner with my ex.
He had been requesting to catch up as friends for a while and given we had been together for eight years we certainly shared a special friendship, so I figured no harm done – particularly in a public setting.
Long story short after a catching up I quickly realised you actually can’t be friends with your ex. Particularly if you or him haven’t moved on yet….
Reasons not to be friends with your ex:
#1 You don’t give each other an opportunity to fully move on.
#2 Whilst he had the last xxx (in my case 8 years) you made the decision not to give him the rest, so stick to that decision.
#3 You put yourself in a vulnerable place of self-doubt. The single confident you, suddenly shrivels up and dies, and all the effort you made to move on dissipates.
#4 You quickly realise why you broke up in the first place, and all of a sudden you are freakin annoyed at him. Annoyed feelings that you left behind are now once again back. Grrrr
#5 You focus attention on your past instead of your present and future.
I’m sure many would disagree (those with children particularly may have to take this with a grain of salt). But meh…. this is my current attitude towards mine and for now I’m sticking by it.
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